Objectives
By the end of this session, players will be able to:
- Recognize that bragging or lying about their sexual reputation is disrespectful and wrong.
- Recognize that spreading stories about someone else’s sexual activity can be disrespectful and harmful.
- Refuse to spread private information or to speak disrespectfully about another person’s sexual reputation.
Talking Points for the Session
- Put-downs and derogatory jokes may seem innocent, but they can cross the line to make someone feel inferior, intimidated, objectified or even violated.
- Many guys think they’re flirting or being funny or cool when making unsolicited comments on a person’s clothing or appearance – they’re not, this is catcalling. You might even think the other person is asking for these comments, but that’s highly unlikely too. No one asks to be harassed because of who they are or how they look.
- Recognize that bragging and using insulting language about a sexual encounter – whether true or not – is disrespectful and unprofessional.
- When you hear stories about someone’s sexual experiences, don’t laugh or encourage it. It’s best to ask the person to stop or leave the situation.
Scenario Activity
Scenario:
(have a player read aloud)
You are working out with Tom and Justin at the gym and you begin to talk about last night at the club. Justin starts talking about the “girl he took home last night” and describes her body in really provocative and somewhat offensive ways. He starts to describe the sexual acts they engaged in, and a few of the things he was able to convince her to do. He continues by describing her as “kind of pathetic and easy.” Tom laughs and makes a joke about a woman whom he refers to as his most recent ‘conquest’ and then goes on to talk about how women constantly fall all over him.
Debrief:
(you can use a ball to toss to different players to answer the questions)
- What do think about the ways in which Tom and Justin describe the women they hook up with?
- For you, is this normal locker room talk? What do you think about the idea of “locker room talk?”
- How do you think it feels to a person when their private intimate details are revealed or when someone uses disrespectful language when talking about them?
- Imagine someone using that same language to describe someone you love, like your sister, daughter, niece, or another person you care about. Would your reaction change? If so, why?
Wrap up and Takeaways
- Describing someone as “pathetic, stupid” or “easy” reinforces damaging negative stereotypes.
- Insults are unacceptable and you can make this known to people you respect.
- Language is powerful, especially when it is used in a negative way. Always speak with respect.